To Be Honest

To be honest

I already miss my world

I wanna return to the darkness

Sometimes, I feel  like I wanna give up

I can't stand with my new life anymore

Pretend to be happy with myself now

Pretend to be alright leaving my past

Pretend to be good girl to others

I can't move freely like before.

I am jealous.

Please Allah,

show me the way

Please return back my past

I feel like I can't go anymore

I'm changed myself wasn't it too rush?

Did I make a mistake? A wrong decision? No.

When everyone left me, then Allah please hold me.

I knew they are famous, they are sexy, they are hot.

Hot fi addunia, while their akhirah? Have they prepared?

or might be HOT FI ADDUNIA WAL AKHIRAH -nauzubillah-